Characteristics of a "Good" Christian Woman
Now, after reading the two previous pages, you may be wondering, what is a "good", Christian woman and how does she behave? According to Mary from Healthy Christian Home and many other websites, a Chrisitan woman should embody all of the following: “1) A Godly woman raises children, 2) A Godly woman shows hospitality, 3) A Godly woman is a servant, 4) A Godly woman is modest and humble, 5) A Godly woman is submissive and respectful, 6) A Godly woman teaches what is good, 7) A Godly woman loves her husband and children, 8) A Godly woman exercises self-control, 9) A Godly woman is a keeper at home, 10) A Godly woman is kind, 11) A Godly woman is thankful, and 12) A Godly woman loves God first” [1]. As you can see, many of the characteristics that would qualify a woman as “Godly” are expectations set by a patriarchal society. They reinforce the idea that the woman is the primary server in a partnership with motherhood, wively duties, and serving God, making up the core of her identity. If religion preaches that these duties are what a “Godly woman” does to satisfy her husband and rear her family, then it becomes apparent why these roles exist today: people believe in the religion and, therefore, believe in the specific roles that the religion assigns to them. In other words, to see paradise, these women must fulfill the roles God’s intended for them. The problem lies when the women who do prefer a “by the books” lifestyle, criticize those that do not. Black women who deviate from the divine feminine standard are often black listed within their own families and the greater black community. This blatant ostracism is only one extreme result, and arguably the worst result, of the black woman following her own path. Social isolation of an already targeted group weakens the individual as well as the unit. Traditional gender roles are now being weaponized and dividing the black community [on a broader scale they are dividing the traditional women from modern women] which completely invalidates the strides that have been made over the years for equality.
With that being said, there has come a time in the modern day where women are making a push to break the traditional box they have been forced into for so long. More and more women are finding traditional gender roles to be unsatisfactory for what they envision for themselves and their future family. Unfortunately though, black women who want to dissociate from the stay-at-home mom role receive more backlash than other non-minorities do for the same decision. This is one of many reasons why this divide amongst black women and the rest of the community [the traditional vs. the nontraditional] is ill timed and, quite frankly, pointless.
References:
[1] Mary, Tersia, Lydia, Yvonne, Deidre, Jackie, Dee, et al. “How to Know You're A Woman of God - 12 Characteristics of a Godly Woman.” Healthy Christian Home, April 22, 2021. https://healthychristianhome.com/characteristics-of-a-godly-woman/.